I find myself with a constant distrust of people. I'm not sure how I became so untrusting, but it is evident in how I approach any kind of relationship. I have been learning for a long time that my lifeline is solely in the blood of Christ for which he sacraficed for me. I find myself impatient with people and trying to somehow fix their problems, rather than allowing God to fix their problems. I'm disheartened by the lack of love my family has for one another. They love, certainly, but we don't grasp true "Jesus" love. The kind of love that turns the other cheek, yet holds one another accountable. The unfailing love. We fail completely at it. I am so easily influenced by others and I have to fight every day to lead a life for an audience of ONE. I find myself being a people pleaser, rather than someone who lives a bold, faithful life sharing the hope of Christ.
I get so disgusted when I turn the tv on and it seems that more and more people are always trying to find "peace" and "centered-ness". Don't they understand where such comes from? Do they really think they have a novel idea. It is timeless. It is the teachings of my Saviour. However no credit is given. Only self-centeredness. Ughhh---I want to vomit. Yet I struggle in standing in the gap for these people who are wandering around in search for 'something' while yet avoiding the ONE who could redeem them. The ONE who has already redeemed them! Oh, I pray for my uncles, aunts and cousins, my grandparents, parents and siblings.
LORD---I love you. I do not show it much. Strengthen me to do so. Let me listen to your quiet voice. Let me know when it is you speaking. Let me abide in your will. Help me flee temptation and forgive me for my sins today. In your precious and holy name, Amen.
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